Below are the letters from Episode 32 2014. Click Here to Watch our Panel discuss these topics and share your thoughts on the letters below.
Letter One: Stronger Apart
Dear Sweet and Sour,
I think this is an odd situation. My boyfriend of 7 years lives in the next suburb. We lived together for 3 years but moved apart more than 3 years ago when he purchased his own home. We had planned to move back in with one another but found that our relationship became stronger living apart. Now after all this time I have pressures from my family and friends that it’s time to move the relationship along and either get married or move back in together.
Neither one of us is opposed to getting married. We don’t need to, but we don’t have any strong objections to it. I love him plenty and he, me; but I don’t want to live with him. We spend some nights at one another’s home and sleep over regularly; we holiday together, visit friends and family together and are planning a family together eventually. But in all of this neither of us wants to live permanently with the other. I run my own business from home and should I fall pregnant and have a baby I’ll employ a full time nanny so that’s not an issue either. The external pressures however make me feel uneasy.
My parents are traditionally minded as are his. And I’m quite amazed that our friends can’t quite pigeon hole us with any degree of comfort. What is so wrong with living apart. We’re both financial enough to do so. Is moving in with one another the natural progression that we shouldn’t fight? Why can’t we stay as we are and progress our relationship?
Brenda, Mt Waverly, Vic
Letter Two: Living Together
Hello Mitch and Panellists,
She’s a little bit of a daddy’s girl but I love her. And I love her loving her dad because he’s such a wonderful man. At 27, she still lives at home with her parents and her dad dotes on her. I’m fine with all of that and I should mention that her mum is great also. We’ve been engaged for 3 months
and I thought it would be a smart idea if we moved in together. Well my friends are completely divided on the issue. Many are telling me that she’s a daddy’s girl and I won’t want her once we live together. Others, who are just a little traditionally minded are anti living together and suggest that without commitment, it’s just a licence for a girl to get everything without much giving much back. Then another group says, forget planning a marriage, just live together. My wonderful daddy’s girl of a fiancé, would prefer to stay at home until we married but she says that I can make that decision for the two of us. I haven’t moved in any direction yet and I’m almost paralysed to make a decision either way. So I’d appreciate a little bit of guidance in this matter folks. Move in or just start planning a wedding and deal with adjusting to one another after the honeymoon?
Mark, Liverpool, NSW
Letter Three: Not Catching On
I’ll come straight out with it. I’ve never had a boy friend. Next year I’ll be thirty and I’ve never had a boyfriend. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a virgin or anything. I had sex for the first time when I was in my late teens but that was more through peer pressure. Since then I’ve had some one night or at the most three night stands, but nothing more than that and usually, when I was on a holiday and travelling somewhere.
I’m not unattractive. A lot of people say that, but I was a moderately successful catalogue and photographic model until 5 years ago when I graduated from Uni as a dentist. So I figure, I could be considered a bit of a catch, but for some reason I’m not. My mum says it’s because I have an aloof air, whatever that is. I agree I’m not much good at small talk but is that a failing? I’m very effeminate. I’m still very fit and healthy looking. I go out very often with my girlfriends all of whom have tried to set me up with guys.
I’ve been on a hundred set up dates but I never get asked out on the follow up. I have a girlfriend who unfortunately for her has the worst body odor on the surface of the Earth. Even she managed to get married two years ago. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. Some tips for getting a boyfriend would be very much appreciated.
Michaela, Wembley, WA
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